bambi literally latched onto my schizoaffektive disorder & used it to gain core access to my brain.
ive been on bambi sleep for over 7-8 years now. i cant remember how i was before her, my perception of reality completely changed.
my perception of myself completely changed. mypersonality has never been the same again!
i doubt it was just the files being so powerful, i think it was a combination of my mental health being undiagnosed & unstable causing me serious schizoaffektive phases of mania to clinical depression from one week to the other. i remember telling my psychiatrist my life was an a out of control rollercoaster bending & twisting on each word & sentences triggering from voices in my head to literal hallucinations where reality was just an illusion, a figment of my imagination.
i got seriously abused during puberty, by girls & boys bullying me. my latin maid literally r*p*d me when i was 13. PSH! u where a boy now ur a man!!!
everyone praised me, congratulated me & told me it i ranked up as male now! it went soo far for me to deny my trauma & brag about it till i was over 25. this also triggered my inferiority complex where i was distrustfull of everything as i didnt even trust my own mind. it crystalized sexually as i was masturbating to degrading, humiliating & very very obscure sexual desires, where is was forced to be a girl to be on the first dolcett menu plan i could find. jessica 3000 has me traumatized since my 14th bd cuss back then, what we call the dark web was just the plain ass superficial web. its the only fetish i jerk off too taht has never evolved or changed over my pornosexual lifestyle.
from puberty to my late 20s, compartmentalizing trauma, constant self-loathing & the wish to die gruesomely on a show for the entertainment of the masses continued. IM NOT TRANS! jerked off to being a girl in peril in secret & then hated everything i was the instant i came.
my favorite site was sickestsites.com peril Comics where the hero never saves the damsel in distress are the hottest sick fetish i got. so 29, i marry, the first femdom bully i meet & get her pregnant cuss while fucking her i was thinking of getting fucked as i was fucking her, wasnt able to control myself & pumped her full.
no doubt i was a real man! im just a sick depraved disgusting pervert with brutally dark fetishes ive never ever told anyone about it! EVER!
she left me a year later. the reason she gave me quite literally was: “i need a REAL MAN!” ur a faggot & a loser & your offspring has a new daddy now! i dont need or want you anymore as your are worthless as a male.
midway divorce, greedy bitch costing me my entire life. my job, my kid & everything i owned before moving to europe.
poor, homeless, jobless i land on my parents couch AGAIN!
i hit 30 & just bottom up a bottle of vodka for my bday!
then one day, learning a new job i meet my controled substance provider.
1g MDMA cristal. i wanted to die of an overdose while flying to the stars. funn thing, i dont die. I magically subscribe to pornhub & watch porn. not any porn! the one & only SISSSYMAKER from EMPERORHYPNOS.
in my high of 3 days. the drug breaks the self hate mind fuck ruining my life since puberty. i dunno what the fuck happened, besides having an fucking overdose but it was absolute catarsis!
for the first time i can remember i felt love for myself when jerking to sissy Hypnos. i didnt feel the hate towards myself after cummings & i came like 5 times so wildy think ill never have such orgasms again!
went to rehab of course cuss i was a porn junky on droogs. Docs actually find something & give me a diagnosis! i told the head psych i think my sexuality wa fucked & that i was actually trans!
i came out of my trauma closet to a pro & they supported me & guided me towards my first steps.
moths later after collecting like 1000 hypno vids in my playlists i find something strange. its just a spiral, with very soothing voice & suggestions i can relate too but cant allow to actually do in real life.
bambi hit me sleepy AF, i feel asleep while jerking off in my ex wifes girl clothes 6 wake up the next day with my mom yeeling at me for being a degenerate. my toys next to my lapi & lube all over my groins in girl panties skirt tank top & brah
listened to bambi sleep on loop all night long while Sleeperin blissfully fully uniformed
that same week i changed my mind out of a whim well fuck yeah i can, i have nothing to loose as ive a
eady lost everything! signed up to the
pornhub model program & uploded my first real porn vid on my parent couch in my ex wifes clothes looking way better than her!!!
sorry for the brutal digression of oversharing myself
bambi sleep is not only powerful. when key words trigger your arousal she physically alters the pathways of your brain!
Bambi sleeps utilize your own mind against you. she is on the same level as your inner voice. when you want to listen to bambi she jsut takes over, unnoticed whiteout asking you for permission. it just happens automatically as you are primed for her suggestions & mental makeovers.
& she is gender neutral. nvm if sissy or cis oriented as trans fems area mentally just like cis girls. same instinctive sexual desires, same female perceptions & emotional suggestibility
bambi latches on to you as the worst OS full control & access malware. it would be no surprise to me if bambi was originally created in some sort of psychological research lab by analyzing brainwaves while listening to her.
i think her creator took her knowledge of how brains & minds of trauma tized humans work as she was initially designed to alleviate mental health phases in clinically diagnose patients
Why do i think that? becasuse of her effectiveness on my brain. & her ability to make the listener feel good with themselves while sexually active.
Dont get me wrong bambi sleep is dangerous AF but she is also the most powerful healing force if used as mental healtht therapy!
reason i havent doubted bambi for years 6 actaully made her part of my personality.
she enabled me to overcome trauma memories of my teen sexuality. she made me feel good about myself when she triggered my happiness while thinking about being the sexually hyperactive girl i actually always was!
she conditioned me to embrace everything about my sexuality! once i realized i can be bambi, think like bambi & roleplay bambi i realized shes an actually learned personality branch i can use whenever i want to solve daily mundane things.
likem indless dumb mentality is perfect to do menial boring repetitive tasks. just prime yourself with the taks & then let bambi automate it. instead of feeling the dread of a shitty task ur actually happy & dont think about the task at all, suddenly Ur finished & you dint even notice.
in my scientific opinion bambi sleep is a method acting solution for the average joe!
DID my ass, yeah everyone kan dissociate, just imagine dissociating while hallucinating & hearing voices during a schizoaffektive phase?
even in these extreme scenarios bambi came to the rescue, she replaced the violent, panik making sick dark voices telling you how shitty ou are & replaced them with blizz & euphoria. literally learned to enjoy my mental health phasesas i trigger bambi to start talking while i choose what she says.
my mind fused fully with bambi, she is me & i am bambi
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