[quote=”Like Ra” pid=”73946″ dateline=”1715867053″] a test of sociopathy?
[/quote]
BOTH Sociopathy & Psychopathy. it doesn’t determine if u is clinically one. As a self-diagnosis it just determines your perception of your own alignment to antisocial & amoral behaviours.
here is OEJTS results
https://openpsychometrics.org/tests/OEJTS/results.php?r=3,4.25,2.75,3.625
well, im clearly way too flexible. i must be distorting my perception of self
which i have a totally valid reason & explanation for.
im schizoaffective. have been since childhood with actual consequences in puberty beside having the best faking imaginary friend ever, he thinks & allows me to feel all the bipolar emotion ranges… im feeling shitty inne me turns into real angsty teen dick hurting you exactly where it hurts the most i ma masochist.
or real long-term onset of symptom after my divorce & before going on HRT.
my schizoaffective role model Hemmingway also channeled their limitless energy into writing!
In the beginning was the word!
dummy, not God or the universe! We, You, me before words we weren’t really here jet!
before any of us can do words, reality doesn’t really make sense. information processing for a baby brain is pure impulse control which is proven they don’t, as they lack self.
& most efficient biological self-learning starter neuronal network with self-upgrading hardware is? the lactating, screaming biological poop machines we see as offspring. instinctively retraining any humans into parents tasked to handle their training in the hopes… of words wording better than previous wordings… it’s always words. not the words themselves, words don’t hurt anyone, I have never hurt myself & self-harmed with a word! it hurts you? its a sound wave from the mouth of one of us, he encoded can’t physically hurt you. it just air vibrating in your ears as nothing can be getting damaged!
you are assigning it an inner self value
& they have no value to anything in the entire universe but us humans! the definition’s we humans assign them to be better at information management & efficient resource allocation
numbers are just words as symbols
fak, fak fak fak plis i beg you stahp triggering me to define key concepts keeping my inner reality together?
na dont stahp, im having fun, im training my cognitive skills & enjoy the shit out of the fact you like & allow me to go filter less here on your territory
ininite-n numbers long autobiographical definitions & concatenations why self is self as self & what im doing that trigger everyone else? The fact i come with a clinically defined warning cops & docs treat with a certain special awe & respect after i inform them of my defining disability is just speed for my ego!
here we goo agaiiin…
My warning label?
permanent incurable but treatable schizoaffective disorder diagnosed here: ICD-11 6A21 & HA60 cuss im trans
[b]irrelevant for this post! just skip if don’t care for trans clinically definition[/b]
#
linking to that very long post of mine, YAY VICTORY FOR ALL TRANS! look its science bitch!
All inklusive, non-offensive, Trans defines us as proud owners of a gender incongruence. ICD-11
they took out the definition we dint like! they just added a new one! making us all? Mashed Potato’s!!!
“incongruent” = imagine mashed potatoes with random sized un-masched potato clumps. acknowledging this & appropriating the term form myself… for writing reasons.
I must admit, we trans do have particular mouthfeel you need to get used too first if you ask me & i like it that way. Maybe try adding more milk!? Trans hucow bambi milk is best ^^
makes me wonder how long some resented sexually attracted mental health simp comes up with the idea of re-mashithe our potatoes with a food processor? Bet is an Aliy, with the best intentions funking it up cuss instead of using definitions them listens to platonic crush rantings & generalizes a specific trans user solution but is egomaniacal enough to have found & solved all umbrela style trans needs.
#
4th wall in a block of potato teasing over. you may procede with your life normally.
glitch like the matrix altering my perceptions of reality by proto testing broke & freed something. if u ever try to do it, don’t do it this way! i did exactly that! it felt & i saw my vision crack right the middle there were gone & i felt like ive always known this, as certainty from this point onto eternity these 2 realities will forever be diverging from this point cuss i chose to split it exactly there! How did you do it? With the inten
surge of fear & distress i split reality with my mind! fak what if im not aware of it & keep splitting realities & realities over & over & over i was the only one able to spit reality if everything will work out as planned by whoever the fuck plans an universal plan… in my head… you realize, reality is there, its just getting distorted & you let your attention get steered by a distortion. its not real chill focus force it! jjust do something to see what happens. parts of yourself start glitching more regularly & consistently. whenever i sort lost control over my focus but im consciously here trying to tune the old analog TVs.
i could see shadow spiders in every posible corner were cables where. When i stared at them they started taking schappe & form. blinking an eye weakens perseption
mothly controled manner
Much of my pointless skills & actual things i do well, including failures, weaknesses & glitches you notice after knowing me for longer time can be explained by my schizoaffective disorder.
comes with birth, difference is having the chance to develop it over the lifespan is a certain percentage or by stressing a deep repetitive social trauma till the unmedicated brain chooses to escape reality at all costs so instead of hurting anyone after losing control, my glitchy brain generates an alternative desired reality. it thinks it knows what I want & need so it shows me soothing color patterns on every surface on a specific angle to my viewpoint, need, or results into to resolve the cognitive dissonance of the trauma trigger the onset.
honestly? I never had a bad psychedelic trip. i never lose control of myself, or my body as im always consciously aware of my reality when im allowed to be by myself.
do ever! on my own. i can always tell if the bullshit im digressing comes from a substance i consumed. my natural hallucinations are real.
my own exprincesas
i on my own, without feedback in the wild or whiteout asking, “do you see what i see?” I have no way of telling the difference. i can hear, touch, smell, see & taste my hallucinations if un-medicated during an onset. as empath in the middle of a phase & i see a wound i feel the wound & feel a pain & depending how aware i am im hallucinating on my mirror neurons… for fak sake. im just hallucinating someone else’s pain as it grossed me out or impressed me. i enjoyed exposure therapy. NOT! & yes
then i get the general distress & endorphin rush of realizing you got hurt & looking at yourself being hurt. I stopped counting the times i saw myself bleed just by seeing someone else’s blood.
combination of bipolar disorder & schizophrenia. as several subtypes exists with more or less of the symptoms manifesting. im the schizoaffective manic type & rarely get depressed & if i get depressed its mainly only due to recent social traumata or prolonged excessive stress or hardship.
your depressed & ma depressed aren the same as i get hardcore depressed, from one day to the other i go from not depressed to clinically depressed needing medication to even get out of bed.
if at that point you go out of your way to trigger me, bash me or bully me as a parent angry at their lazy kid yelling & all other nice intrafamiliar relationship goals you might come up with as a good balanced parent, you will eventually push that one button pushing me into maniacal depression which is the single most dangerous onset of symptoms i know off & need immediate hospitalization! if i even doubt i might be headed for this symptomatic. i just call an ambulance & self-report for the 3-day observation period at the main mental health hospital with Dr Sigmund Freud name on it.
depending on the onset & main phase of the Manically depressed symptomatic. it wildly varies on day, people weather, chores & even from spoon to spoon while eating… it’s like 100% negative emotional reaction to everything while being so fast my sentences, plans & then actually doing the chore make no sense to Normals. logic does work & i notices how weird im acting just feel im plain ass crazy risky & can’t evaluate risk or own strengths and abilities & can’t be trusted with being responsible by myself!
a average scenario? I lose total impulse control if you trigger me & self-perception while literally having suicidal idealizations or at the very least strong self-harm desires i won’t notice at all & think & feel it’s just a regular normal day.
BDSM becomes an addiction & this happend while in a phase i was already medicated!
https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=ph5ec852123c152
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.